My Horizontal Life by Chelsea Handler

My Horizontal Life by Chelsea Handler... funny and a little bit sad. I wasn't disappointed with her wit or storytelling and my guess is that her newer books are even better. For all the hype about her promiscuous behavior, I found it ironic that most of the one-night stands either involved a longer term relationship or no sex at all.

In fact, I'm pretty sure that most of my sorority sisters were giving it away on a much more frequent basis than Chelsea did. I was slightly discouraged that some of the encounters didn't quite ring true, but I'm sure she edited and embellished  each tale (or should I say, tail...hahaha) for maximum entertainment value. But the abrupt ending left me hanging and now I have to buy the next book.

I found her approach fresh and real and look forward to seeing how her storytelling has improved with the newer books. Do not buy this book if you are offended by female sexuality, even though the anecdotes are not graphic, those with a more prudish view on the reality of dating in the current century may be offended, as several of her more negative reviews reflect. (I offer this disclaimer because my own book has been compared to porn by a negative reviewer. Upon checking her other reviews and reading list, it was readily apparent that this was a highly religious person who should never have bought a book with the tagline; Sex, Love, Betrayal in the first place.) On the other hand, if you enjoy the irreverent, raw and self-deprecating humor of Chelsea Handler, you will not regret downloading your own copy.

Overall, a highly enjoyable, light read that was easy to set down between chapters and come back to when I had more time. It is not an engrossing memoir, but I don't think it was meant to be either. My Horizontal Life kept me giggling, and occasionally cringing, throughout. Currently only $5.00 on Amazon, it's hard to pass up.

Happy Reading!

**Disclaimer: I am not a professional literary reviewer. I do not know this author and I am not being paid or otherwise compensated for this review. The opinions stated here are mine alone.

Barney's..."Big Mistake. Huge! I Must Go Shopping Now."

I felt a little bit like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman this weekend (minus the prostitution part, of course). My Mom was in Arizona for a visit, and being her only daughter I reap the rewards of her need to spend money on girly things. Now, my mother is not hurting for funds, but she's not going to be asked to participate in the Pacific Northwest's (where she's from) version of Housewives anytime soon--too down to earth. So there we were, a couple of ladies dressed for a comfortable day of serious shopping at Scottsdale Fashion Square, when we felt the urge to see the handbags at Barney's.

Maybe I'm overprotective, but my mom is one of the sweetest ladies ever and I hate when she gets her feelings hurt, so after watching the size zero sales lady (I use the term loosly) ignore us for ten minutes in favor of chatting with a fellow clerk, I'd had enough. As I took my mom's arm to lead her away, the woman finally looked us up and down and with a look of distaste said, "Is there something you wanted to see?" Really? I'm sorry, but I don't feel the need to throw up fifteen times a day so that a minimum wage clerk (I'm assuming she isn't paid on commission) will find me worthy of her attention. Do they realize that Neiman's sells Fendi purses too?

I really wanted to bitch-slap the little tart right out of Barney's and into Forever 21, H&M, or Charming Charlie--all fun stores with disposable clothing and accessories for bargain prices (and right outside the exit from the B-word). She might learn a few things from their friendly sales staffs! I'm not wealthy, so I normally wouldn't even walk in to a store like that because a $1,000 plastic purse (hello, Louis Vuitton) seems a bit ridiculous to me. But my mom is passionate about four things: Her family, good food, shoes, and accessories. And I don't mind being on the receiving end of those gifts either.

So... the purpose of this rant is to pose a question: does showing your wealth make you more worthy? Do you have to be rich to receive good customer service? Not that there weren't signs for this rude woman to see that even though my mom hadn't stepped off the runway, she might have the coinage to drop on the handbag she was lusting after. Me? Not so much, but if buying that purse made her feel good, shouldn't she have the opportunity to do so? Aren't you in the business of selling the over-priced objects in your store? What happened to common courtesy?

In case you're wondering, the day ending up being a blast! We had lunch at Nordstrom's and mom parted with quite a bit of "mad money" at Louis Vuitton, Gucci, Neiman's, Nordy's and the "fun" stores I mentioned earlier. But I wanted to use the power of the Internet to say, "Shame on you Barney's!" We won't be coming back until your staff receives a serious attitude adjustment...for now, we'll buy our goodies elsewhere. And a warning to the next person who thinks they can make my mom feel bad: I'm not above snatching every last hair off your head! ;)

Salt, Inception & The Town

**Good**

I watched The Town last night on blu-ray and would give it 3 out of 5 stars. Not a new premise, but the acting was good. It kept me awake until the end with its action-filled chase scenes. And even threw in a love story for good measure (and a believable one at that). Would I watch it again? Probably not.

Am I recommending that you watch it? Sure. It's a good movie and I personally always enjoy gazing at Ben Afleck--he is decent eye-candy after all. The Town is entertaining and that's really what it's all about.

On a side note, I was surprised to see Blake Lively playing the doped out drug mule, but her performance was one of the best in my opinion. I won't give away the ending, but I will say that I didn't love it.

**Better**

The first thing I want to say about this movie is that it wasn't as confusing as people had been telling me. Great concept, excellent acting and interesting special effects all came together to make a movie I hadn't had much interest in seeing become one that I would likely watch again.

My biggest complaint is that the background music was loud during much of the dialog, making it more difficult to understand what was being said (and almost every word spoken was important to understanding the plot). I turned up the volume and solved the problem, but I may have sustained permanent hearing loss;).

Definitely a must watch if only to give you something interesting to talk/debate about. I've often wondered if my reality was simply a dream and Inception is an interesting take on the idea. 4 out of 5 stars from me.

**Best**

I loved this movie! Pure edge of your seat fun! I want to kick ass like Angelina Jolie does. And it's more than just action... the depth of the script really takes you into the lives, minds and emotions of the characters wrapping it all up in a neat bow without being confusing or even unrealistic.

And Salt should have gotten more recognition for the overall picture as well as the acting--which was fantastic! Rent this movie... you won't be disappointed! I give this movie 5-stars.

**Disclaimer: I am not a professional movie critic and I am not being paid or otherwise compensated for this review. The opinions stated here are mine alone.

A Taste Of Magic by Tracy Madison

I recently finished reading A Taste of Magic by Tracy Madison and wanted to pass on this inexpensive piece of fun. The novel is currently only $.99 and well worth the download if you enjoy contemporary romance with a little magic mixed in. It is not going to be named the next great American novel, but that's not the kind of book I'm looking for anyway:).

If you enjoy this book, the author has three others that follow a magical theme--all available for Kindle and all reasonably priced. I can't speak to the others since I haven't yet read them, but when my to be read pile dwindles a bit and I finally finish my second book, I will definitely be logging on to download.

I would love to hear what others think, so log in and leave a comment. Do you have a favorite author who writes about love and magic? I would appreciate any and all recommendations!

Happy Reading!

**Disclaimer: I am not a professional literary reviewer. I do not know this author and I am not being paid or otherwise compensated for this review. The opinions stated here are mine alone.

Indie Authors... Editing Frustration?

I love being an independent author! I love having complete autonomy over the product I put out and reaping the rewards. But it is so frustrating to spend hours, days... months? editing (and having professionals edit for you as well) only to put the product into the marketplace and find errors! I am running into this issue now and while the errors are minor, they are still there. I have tried consoling myself with the fact that I have read books by national best sellers and found mistakes, but it's not working in soothing my ire.

My example is in Chapter 8 of An Unexpected obsession, the "n" was overlooked at the end of the word "known" so that it reads "know" instead. I didn't catch it, my editor didn't catch it, and none of the people who were given advanced proofing copies of my book caught it. I realize that it is minor and it is easy for the readers brain to add a letter to a word when you know it is supposed to be there, but how many eyes need to see the same work before you can be assured the mistakes have all been caught?

On the bright side, as an indie it is possible to make changes and re-upload your book in a short amount of time. But it is still embarrassing for those of us trying to overcome the stigma of "unpolished" when your efforts do not come out perfect. Have any of you other indie authors run into this dilemma? How do you overcome the issue? Am I being too much of a perfectionist?

And how do you let your reading public know that adjustments have been made to correct the errors? I am joining a local writers group this year and hope the extra eyes will ensure the few mistakes that passed unnoticed for my first book are not overlooked in the next ones, but is it enough? Is there a group already in existence where indie authors band together to read each others work after an editor has given their stamp of approval?

I'm open to ideas, suggestion and browbeating:)

Happy Writing!

Great Book! The Crossroads Cafe by Deborah Smith

Wonderful, simply wonderful. Deborah Smith's heartwarming story, The Crossroads Cafe, kept me turning the pages! I can't express how very much I enjoyed this book. It was sweet and tragic and... fantastic!

Her portrayal of two wounded souls, finding comfort and a reason for living in a small town where the heart of the community is a local cafe makes this novel comfort food for your brain. You feel as if you've been transported to this tiny dot on the map and swept into the lives of the people who reside there.

I don't want to give away any spoilers, but you simply must read this book! I absolutely loved it and can't wait to read more by this author. I downloaded The Crossroads Cafe as a freebie, but would have paid the average cost for an eBook in a heartbeat had I known how good the story would be. It is currently priced at $8.59 (which I believe is way too high for any digital book) and would recommend putting it on your wishlist until the cost comes down. Also available for Nook (although for an even higher price) and with a different cover.

The reviews are mixed, but I read a lot and really enjoyed this book. I am not sure why some people did not like it, but there were references to predictability (isn't that the romance genre in general?). I like a happy ending, so it was just what I was looking for.
Happy Reading!

**Disclaimer: I am not a professional literary reviewer. I do not know this author and I am not being paid or otherwise compensated for this review. The opinions stated here are mine alone.